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Selfcare & Sexual Wellness

Body image

Is Vanilla Really the Only Flavour?
Since man (and woman) first came to exist on this earth, not a single person is born with the same characteristics. Even identical twins tend to differ in personality, with often diverse and sometimes opposing personalities.
Studies have shown that men are attracted to a certain type of woman and that women are also drawn towards men with particular characteristics. However, these studies have also concluded that the reasons are mostly due to the biological needs of the human species.
In fact, almost every living species of plant or animal strives to ensure the future of their species continues. So, whether it’s about being the biggest, the brightest, the tallest or the smallest, diversity produces the variety that we see today. It also ensures that we survive, as a species and provides safeguards against a singular domination, by a specific type.
Diversity or Monotone Revenues?
In terms of sex, fantasy and the relatively simple notion of attraction, diversity is crucial. The issue may be that many of those producing the everyday imagery, concentrate solely on their own preferences.
If for example a survey suggests that 40% of the revenues produced by a service come from people seeking blondes with big breasts, does this mean that all your content should be of this genre? Of course not! Being diverse means catering for the many, rather for the few. The other 60% is actually made up of the majority and whilst it may involve more work in the short term, it brings huge dividends long term.

Daring to be Different
BBW, GND, MILF, PS, Asian, Short, Hirsute, Bald, HW, Lesbian, or Teen. Just one of a myriad of ‘labels’ we give to individuals to try and describe why we feel them to be different to something called ‘normal’. Of course ‘normal’ is always in the eye of the beholder. Everyone sees things differently and that includes how we look at other people.
Some may consider a size 12 model overweight; others think she is seductively curvy. Another may find a petite size 6 extremely attractive, whilst someone else calls her skinny.
Fashion does have a hand in all this, with the ever changing vision of what is supposedly ‘perfection’. The reality of course, is that we are all being fed images where someone else has made the decision as to what is the current ‘cream of the crop’.

Should advertisers be more responsible?
Sadly, with advertising at its most prominent, these impressions are readily available wherever we look and also to impressionable youngsters, who are way too young to understand the current marketing strategies.
We see girls as young as 5 wanting to copy the look of the latest female pop stars or influencers. They have already decided the body image they want to strive for and find it almost impossible to accept the body they have. By the time they reach their early teens, they are already struggling with mental health problems. Many feeling they have failed and are shunned by the rest of society.
Some may argue that parents should be more responsible for their children and restrict internet and TV access. However, these images are all around us and it would be very difficult to ensure their children were not subjected to this kind of imagery, day in and day out.
In fact, it would make much more sense if society as a whole were to accept responsibility for the upbringing of the future generations. Every generation should be accountable for the next one.
When reality is no longer real
Understanding that the things we see on the TV, in films and on the internet are often glorified versions of reality would help. When I was growing up, I understood that fairy tales were just stories and that pop stars were actually ordinary people underneath it all. However, fake news and pictures were very few and far between and therefore much more of what was seen could be taken for granted.
Empathy and even perhaps a simple reality check is required in all age groups. Understanding that the reality shows of today are about as far from reality as you could get, is difficult for many to grasp. Especially if it is something an individual has grown up with. I’m not even sure what ‘make believe’ means anymore.
How do we make things better?
Understanding that labels are different to tags is a starting point. A label puts an individual into a box which often has the lid very much closed. It doesn’t encourage people to grow or to flourish and denotes a static description.
Companies that appreciate and recognize the different characteristics are also the ones that show the most empathy to their workers. They do not work on an elitist level and are unlikely to promote divas or divos to the detriment of others.
In fact, this is how they find the real ‘stars’ of the show. They allow an individual to promote themselves as they are, recognizing that there are plenty of others out there who are interested. This is often how ‘Plain’ Jane and ‘Mediocre’ Robert get to top the charts in both popularity and earnings. They use their personality and real time characteristics to engage with their fans. People really do see more than just the front cover and discover that there are some truly beautiful and amazing people within.
So, the next time a ‘Jane’ or a ‘Robert’ apply to become the next influencer or model on your site, remember they do have a personality. More to the point, that personality is most likely what will make both them, and your company revenue.
Stay Safe
Love Carla x

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Selfcare & Sexual Wellness

Ways to embrace your femininity and unleash your inner goddess

When stress levels get high and everyday life gets full, women tend to forget about themselves. And it is never an easy road to get the best version of yourself, and embodying that gorgeous, divine energy can be challenging. Embracing your femininity and connecting to your inner goddess energy is a way of feeling happier, healthier and sexier.
The good news is that there are some super simple steps you can take to rectify this type of imbalance and recalibrate your energy. And with this thing in mind, we invite you to be conscious of the following small tips.

You are more than a physical body
Close your eyes and let your other senses awaken as you focus on the beauty that is your gorgeous female body – your hips, the curve along your side body, the fullness of your breasts. Feel all of the parts of you that make you a woman. Fall in love with all of it and feel the intensity of your goddess energy.
Remember this exact feeling when you are clothed and feel like criticizing yourself for not being what a woman should be. You are everything a woman should be.

Engage in sacred sex
When your brain is going a mile a minute, and you’re constantly thinking about all the things you need to get done, or especially if you are a cam model, sex can therefore become something that’s done mechanically, and without thinking – like you’re on autopilot. Not exactly sexy, right?! Engaging in sacred sex can help you instantly get back in touch with your true feminine energy.This doesn’t have to mean doing something wild and crazy, although it absolutely can, if that’s cup of cake! But it can also be as simple as spending the night connecting with your partner over your meal, defusing some oils, playing some soft music, taking a bath together, having a spirited conversation, and then luxuriate in each other’s physical presence. Lose yourself in the ride! And if you currently don’t have a partner, start to explore your own body. Give yourself coconut oil breast massage, touch, look and explore your beautiful temple and get to know what you desire.

Reward yourself
Rewarding yourself from time to time is good, especially if you are immersing yourself in places, stories or experiences. Sometimes a get-away in your downtimes can help you connect to yourself, and find the best version of yourself. Other times a get-away comes as a well deserved planned holiday, which for sure will reset your mindset. One thing is sure, as long as you surround yourself with what you love and people that you love and love you back, your radiance will shine through.

Dress to impress… yourself!
When you look in your wardrobe, is black the predominant colour? Do you always reach for the darkest, most serious clothes? How about a change? Experiment with colour. Pick clothes not based on how trendy they are, but on how beautiful they make you feel while you’re wearing them. Mix fabrics and patterns, go for swirly, flowy dresses that will make you feel feminine and sexy.

Have an open heart
Living with an open heart means that one is vulnerable to hurt, disappointment, and rejection. Being open-hearted and fully receptive to others involves more than just saying, “I’m an open-hearted person.” It is necessary to get vulnerable, get real, and show gratitude.

We must be proud of our body and our ability to intuitively connect to everything surrounding us. Celebrate yourself by taking the time to connect and honour your body for all that it does for you! Read more articles here

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Selfcare & Sexual Wellness

Gender Specifics

There was a time when the question was a simple ‘Male or Female’? Nowadays, the question has expanded to a whole paragraph, with many people not even understanding some descriptions on the page in front of them.
It comes back to that whole labelling obsession we now have. Society demands we label ourselves and each other and at times it’s difficult to recall which labels we have attached!
If (as a female who may occasionally partake in some female company) I must categorize my gender as no longer simply being ‘Female’, which option should I go for?
I could go the whole way and decide that I am ‘Gender Neutral’. Gender Neutral is a term invented by people who prefer that language, policies and social institutions avoid distinguishing roles according to someone’s sex or gender.
Almost 40% of the world’s population speaks a gender native language. This of course proves problematic for those against any kind of gender based societal practices.

Gender Types
In general terms, there are only 4 genders that apply to living and non-living objects, which are masculine, feminine, neuter and common.
Other more recent listings will have you believe that there are more than 50 different genders, including Androgynous, Bigender, Cis Female, Genderqueer, Non-binary, Pangender, Transexual and many more.
Why the need to produce type after type of different styles and types of being. I am (after all) a product of my parents, born a female and still acting to all intent and purposes, as a female. However, does my sexual activity mean I should be relabelled as bisexual?
The big question is whether it is the individual themselves who wish to be labelled or indeed invent the label, or is it others unable to accept someone outside of the norm, who are making up these labels on (what seems to be) a daily basis?

The Language of Gender
If you play sport, you may refer to yourself as a ‘Sportsman’ or ‘Sportswoman’. That definition allows other people to identify the individual as female or male. It doesn’t necessarily provide any political or social reasoning behind the person participating. If we all start using the term ‘Sportsperson’, doubts and questions are immediately at the forefront of our mind.
If it’s a footballer, those opposed to females playing footie will be desperately trying to ascertain if their interest is piqued or not. I personally dislike watching female footballers and cannot watch female boxers but to be honest, with boxing, which includes males also. I hate fighting – period! For similar reasons I dislike Rugby and Wrestling. Some men feel the same way. It’s nothing to do whether it is a female or male dominated sport. It’s the activity and general feeling behind the sport in question.
There is no denying that when someone excels in an activity normally undertaken by the opposite sex, people generally sit up and take note. Whether it is due to their physique being matched to the pursuit, or achieved through years of training, they are noted and celebrated as going against the norm.

Gender Neutrality and the Human Race
The incidence of individuals being born which are neither masculine or feminine is incredibly small and yet society has introduced any number of descriptions relating to someone who does not fit the typical mould.
The big question is, who requested those labels? Was it the individuals themselves, or those seeking to extract them from a generalised description?
Surely a world where we are all classed as individuals is paramount to allowing everyone to exist in a world of equality. We are (in the main) either male or female because of the chromosome that the male parent contributes. We are born and then grow with a straightforward set of biological structures, depending upon whether we are born male or female. Our parents tend to concentrate on supplying the care required, depending upon our sex.

Acceptance
Some people do not feel comfortable with their allotted gender and struggle from an early age to fit into a mould which doesn’t suit them. Instead of seeing these people as having problems, why do we not see them as simply not conforming to a nominal standard? Why can we not allow them to flourish as an individual human being?
We do not need to label or put them inside a box which conforms to a set standard. Looking beyond what society demands is surely the way forward. Allowing everyone the freedom to be whomever they want to be, at any time they want to be, is surely a better way forward.

Removing the stigma of labelling and anything which does not conform means we progress towards a greater understanding of others. Acceptance is the key to opening up a much bigger and brighter world for all.

Love Carla Sez x

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Selfcare & Sexual Wellness

How to Protect Your Privacy as a Performer

It’s easy to get hooked on the fame that comes along with being a top webcam model. After all, who doesn’t want to wake up every day and get glammed up for adoring fans who can’t wait to spoil you with tips, tokens, and gifts? With celebrity, however, comes the responsibility of keeping yourself and your loved ones safe from fans who could become a little overzealous about the prospect of meeting you in person. That’s why it’s important to ensure your privacy is protected at all times, even if you have an online career that requires you to be in the public eye. At Cams.com, we care about the safety of all models, so we made a list of easy ways you can stay safe while loving what you do.

Keep Your Personal Social Media Accounts Private

One of the most important things you can do as a webcam model is to ensure your real name and social media accounts are protected. Set all your personal accounts to “private” and remove your real last name as an extra line of security if someone does find your personal profiles. You should also avoid tagging your location in posts when you’re out and about, as you don’t want to provide the general public with information about where you are and where you like to hang out.

Keep Personal and Professional Photos Separate

Your success as a webcam model relies heavily on the sexy photos you post, so by all means, feel free to post away. Just be sure not to use any pics that are also posted to your private accounts, however. You may have a few shots you love and want to share with your fans, but if a fan decides to use one for a Google Image Search, it will lead them right to your personal social media accounts, your real identity, and worse yet, your loved ones. Be sure to check the background of each photo as well to ensure you’re not giving away your location, as simple things like street signs and local landmarks can lead people right to you.

Don’t Reveal Your Location During Shows

It can be easy to slip up during a hot chat and reveal your location, so exercise caution when getting chummy with your favorite members. Even something as simple as mentioning a local event you attended or a hangout you like to frequent can be enough to tip someone off on where they can find you.

If a Fan Sends You a Link, Don’t Open it

It can be tempting to click on links sent to you by fans during free chat or even a private show but avoid opening them at all costs, even if they’re sent by a member you know well. One simple click can make it possible for a fan to find your IP address and pinpoint your exact location. So rather than having them show up at your favorite restaurant or bar and waiting for you outside, they could potentially show up at your door, which is something no cam model wants to deal with.

Make Sure Nothing That Gives Away Your Location is in View

Ensure your camming space is free from anything that could give away your location, such as local posters or even memorabilia from your hometown sports teams. If you’re broadcasting near a window, also make sure nothing is visible that could make it easy for someone to find you. Something as simple as a landmark or building outside your window could provide a map right to your camming space.

Use the Tools Your Platform Provides

Platforms like Cams.com offer geoblocking services, so don’t be afraid to use them if you want to block people in your local area from viewing your webcam room. If you want to exchange messages with a top fan and let them know when you’re going to be online, stick to the private messaging feature your platform provides, rather than communicating via other social mediums you have less control over.

These tips make it easy to protect your privacy and enjoy your time online. Until next time, stay safe! Read more articles here

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